NOTE: This article is from a satire/comedy website called The Onion

January 17, 2008

NEW YORK—An International Association of Athletics Federations ruling Monday disallowing double-leg amputee Oscar Pistorius, who uses special Cheetah-brand racing prosthetics, from participating in the 2008 Beijing Olympics has left over 70 U.S. Olympic track and field hopefuls feeling "pretty stupid" for their recent decisions to cut off their own legs in an attempt to gain a similar advantage. "I really wish they would have told me before I amputated my legs that I wouldn't be allowed to run with those performance-enhancing prosthetic limbs," 110-m. hurdles competitor David Payne said from his recovery room at the Johns Hopkins intensive care unit. "If...